You got the offer. Congratulations — seriously. That’s the hard part.
Now comes the part most people mess up: the negotiation.
Some people don’t negotiate at all because they’re afraid the offer will be rescinded. (This almost never happens.) Some people negotiate aggressively because a blog post told them to “always counter 20% higher.” (This sometimes backfires.)
The truth is somewhere in the middle, and it’s less scary than you think.
Why You Should (Almost Always) Negotiate
Here’s a number that should motivate you: the average successful salary negotiation increases an offer by 5-10%. On a $120,000 base salary, that’s $6,000-12,000 more per year. Over five years (assuming raises build on your base), that’s $30,000-60,000.
For one awkward conversation.
Companies expect you to negotiate. They build room into their offers for exactly this purpose. When you accept without negotiating, you’re leaving money on the table that was already budgeted for you.
The exception: if the offer is already above market rate and above your expectations, it’s okay to just say yes. Not everything needs to be a chess match.
Before You Negotiate: Do Your Research
You can’t negotiate effectively if you don’t know what the market pays. Before the conversation:
Check compensation data. Levels.fyi (for tech), Glassdoor, and Payscale are starting points. Talk to people in similar roles if you can — real data from real humans beats aggregated website data.
Know your numbers. What’s your minimum acceptable salary? What would make you genuinely excited? What’s the midpoint? Walking into a negotiation without knowing your own range is like going to a car dealership without checking the Blue Book value.
Understand the full package. Base salary is one component. There’s also equity/RSUs, signing bonus, annual bonus, PTO, remote work flexibility, learning budget, relocation assistance. Sometimes a company can’t move on salary but can add a $10K signing bonus or extra equity.
The Conversation: What to Actually Say
Step 1: Express Genuine Enthusiasm
When they call with the offer, your first response should ALWAYS be positive. Even if the number is lower than you hoped.
“Thank you so much — I’m really excited about this opportunity. I enjoyed meeting the team and I can see myself doing great work here.”
This is not manipulation. It’s basic social awareness. They just decided to hire you. Respond to that positively before you start negotiating.
Step 2: Ask for Time
“I’d love to take a day or two to review the full details. Could you send the offer in writing?”
Never negotiate on the spot. You’re emotional, you might have anxiety residue from the process, and you need time to think clearly. Taking 24-48 hours is completely normal and expected.
Step 3: The Counter
When you’re ready, here’s a framework that works:
“Thanks again for the offer. After reviewing the details, I’m very excited about the role. Based on my research of market rates for this role and my experience with [specific relevant skill/experience], I was hoping we could discuss the base salary. I was targeting something in the [X to Y] range. Is there flexibility there?”
Key elements:
- Start positive. Always.
- Give a range, not a single number. Your target should be the bottom of your stated range. If you say “$130-140K,” they’ll likely meet you around $130K, which was your actual goal.
- Ground it in something real. Market data, your experience, a competing offer. Not “I want more money.”
- Make it a question, not a demand. “Is there flexibility?” invites collaboration. “I need $140K” invites a standoff.
What If They Say No?
If they can’t move on salary, that’s not the end of the conversation.
“I understand the salary range is fixed. Would it be possible to explore a signing bonus? Or additional equity?”
Other things to negotiate when salary is rigid:
- Signing bonus (one-time, often easier to approve)
- Extra PTO days
- Remote work flexibility
- Earlier performance review / salary review (e.g., 6 months instead of 12)
- Professional development budget
- Title adjustment (which affects future negotiations)
Mistakes People Make
Negotiating Before They Give a Number
If they ask for your salary expectations before making an offer, try to redirect: “I’d prefer to learn more about the role first. I’m sure we can find something that works for both sides.” If they insist, give a range based on your research, not your current salary.
Using Their Lowball as Your Anchor
If they offer $100K and you counter with $110K, you’ve anchored around their number. If your research says the market rate is $125K, counter with $125-135K. Don’t let their first number define the range.
Threatening to Walk When You Won’t
“I have other offers” only works if (a) it’s true and (b) you’re genuinely willing to walk. Empty bluffs can backfire badly. If you DO have other offers, mention them matter-of-factly. “I’m currently evaluating another opportunity at [level of specificity you’re comfortable with]. Your role is my top choice, but I want to make sure the compensation is competitive.”
Negotiating by Email When a Call Would Be Better
Email feels safer because you can craft every word. But tone gets lost in text. “I was hoping for a higher base salary” reads very differently than it sounds in a friendly phone conversation. For the actual negotiation, call or video chat. Use email for follow-ups and confirmations.
Not Negotiating Because You’re “Grateful”
You can be grateful AND negotiate. These aren’t opposites. The company is hiring you because you’ll create value for them. This is a business transaction, not a charity. Being polite and professional while also advocating for fair compensation is not ungrateful — it’s expected.
Negotiation for Different Situations
Your First Job
You have less leverage but you should still try. Even a small bump in your starting salary compounds over your entire career. Focus on: “I’ve researched market rates for this role in this area, and I was hoping we could discuss…” You don’t need competing offers or years of experience to negotiate.
When You Have Competing Offers
This is the strongest position to be in. Be honest: “I’m deciding between your offer and another opportunity. Your role is my preference because [genuine reason], but the other offer is more competitive on compensation. Is there room to close that gap?”
Don’t lie about having competing offers. Don’t inflate competing offers. People talk, industries are small, and getting caught in a lie during a negotiation will absolutely get your offer rescinded.
When You’re Underpaid at Your Current Job
Don’t base your negotiation on your current salary. Your current employer underpaying you is not relevant to your market value. Many places have made it illegal for employers to ask for salary history. If they do ask, redirect: “I’d rather focus on the value I’ll bring to this role and what the market rate looks like.”
After the Negotiation
Whatever the outcome, be gracious. If they meet you halfway, say thank you and mean it. If they can’t move at all, decide based on the total package and opportunity, not just the number.
And get everything in writing. Verbal promises during negotiation don’t count until they’re in the offer letter.
Related: The negotiation is the last step. Make sure you nail everything before it — starting with what interviewers actually look for and how to structure your behavioral answers.